My sister is taking my 12-y-o's nephew and his 6th grade class to a midnight showing tomorrow. I have never been so jealous of her and her class chaperone duties.

I'm nominating you for "Great Moments in Jezebel History." What, isn't that a thing?

Okay, that shit is funny. And thank you for the appreciation of my shark line. I have a shark jaw framed & hanging above my desk, just to remind me how awesom & vicious I am.

I'm a lady lawyer and a feminist. When I want to feel extra powerful and bad-ass (like She-Hulk, another lady lawyer), I wear a pair of ass-kicking heels (tall, pointy, jet black like the eye of a great white shark). They are my "bitch with a capital C" shoes, and you can have them when you can pry them off of my…

But she's our prom queen!

I've been watching the GOP primary - is that the same as watching an abortion?

It's clear that the article was about methamphetamine-exposed infants - methadone isn't even mentioned in the article. So, I was simply pointing that out to HelloNurse. Methadone is a "safer" drug when used under clinical supervision, but it is used to wean addicts off of opiates, not methamphetamine.

"Meth" in this article refers to methamphetamine, not methadone. If only it was methadone.

I am going to watch the hell out of this new Steel Magnolias.

Sorry, everyone knows that "first dibs" doctrine is recognized under the Hague convention, as is king's X, shotgun, and magic bubble.

Dibs on conjugal visits!

Stop! You are getting science all over my logical fallacy!

"Christ is edgy, dawg!" just made me guffaw.

We went with a large group in the fall for a friend's birthday. We couldn't get over how friendly everyone was. Maybe it's from being in the chilly-er Northwest, but damn, people were so nice - and not just in the tourist-y areas. We're already thinking of going back.

What's Detroit's local cuisine?

Hell, my parents were married (ie no custody dispute) and they forgot me twice. Great parents, just a combo of having five kids and a lot going on. I'm fine.

Absolutely agree, though I find that I can taste a huge difference between a $5 bottle and a $10 bottle at Trader Joe's. If you find a good cheap bottle, buy a case.

Rickman is so good in that, and it's such a great view of California wine country in the 70s.

10 minutes under the lamp? The salon where I go uses Shellac and it only takes 30 seconds per coat (undercoat, polish, polish, top coat = 2 minutes).

This. Mandating that insurance that covers prescription drugs not treat prescription drugs that stop babies is (a) not the same as saying the Gubmint has to pay for slutty pills and (b) simply forces insurance companies to provide equal coverage to all, regardless of gender. The frickin' end.