The 25 yo is out of the age range you give in your example, so she's meta-theoretical.

You forgot:

None of those kids seems to show any interest in academics and it seems that they're barely homeschooled. The oldest started a used car lot. I doubt any of those kids is going to make it through med school.

Yes, Jinjur, general of the girls' army.

When I was a tiny 7-year-old, a classmate of mine used to taunt red-headed me with the rhyme: Red on the Noodle, like the Pecker on a Poodle." It made me feel embarrassed and dirty and made me cry everytime, and I was too horrified to be able to tell anyone what it was that he actually said. I can laugh at it now…

Awww, I really liked that show.

On #2, that's a serious consideration I hadn't thought of before, likely because I come from a place of privilege (perceived White, educated, professional). Having a hyphenate or different name from my kids would not likely subject me to any scorn, except from my sister in law and I kind of enjoy pissing her off.

Kate Winslet is dating some guy named Ned Rocknroll. When she dumps him, you should make your move, because that's a kickass last name.

Me! I want to read your blog!

Also, maybe look into springing for those fake lash extensions, so no need for mascara. I have a couple of friends who have them, and they put my puny mascara'd lashes to shame.

Thank god they ain't churches, because when I'm at the W, I'm not on my knees praying.

Dude, you totally forgot Georgetown. It is rank with the smell of Hipster.

She dressed as a Seattle Sounders player. Can't remember his name, but it's French, and he has a ridiculous moustache.

I suspect that the $1000/month award evidences the judge's exercise of discretion, since she earns 11 times that. A $1000/month award is miniscule compared to what would have been awarded in most cases I've seen, where the income is so disparate between the parties.

"you'd probably just get drunk and end up having ill-advised, unprotected sex and want to TELL EVERYONE ABOUT IT." Isn't that how you all got your babies?

I find the "Do It (Tomorrow)" app a perfectly cromulent way to keep lists, and it has an in-browser version at www.tomorrow.do.

This is ridiculous. She's dressed as a Sounders FC supporter. I don't get how you get cat burglar out of that.

It's a high school title contest. Boys have run for queen before, and girls have run for king. Why worry so much about what it means and who can run for what?

I didn't call it meaningless, I called it laughable.

In a culture where we (at least in theory) value individualism, hard work, Horatio Alger and pull-yourself-up-by-your-own-bootstraps-ology, the idea that being a head of state by way of lucky birth - that being King is a birthright - is pretty laughable. Your two princes seem like lovely boys, but the only thing…