Anyone that has a sobbing meltdown over waiting for fast food needs to have their gun removed and to have their fitness for duty evaluated. 

As his location edged closer on my phone, I spotted his big, blue eyes in the crowd and his sign above his head. Be still my beating heart.

What kind of insensitive monster uses a boarded up building for a photo OP?

Maybe you should stop writing compliments -- you’re bad at it.

It seems a little weird to have an article about a performer being erased from videos that doesn’t include a picture of the performer?

More likely scenario is there are dozens of property brothers, it’s the only way you can explain how they can be on so many shows all at once. Same goes for Gordon Ramsey.  

There’s only one property brother. He’s just jumping back and forth very quickly. 

How can you say that when 21 Pilots exist?

I’ve reached a stage in my life where I basically go “Those are young people clothes. Let the young people enjoy themselves.’ Fully remembering that JNCOs existed in my youth. No my youth per se, I owned more than one pair of giant Enycé overalls and hoodies, so I can’t really cast any stones.

The answer is C, dating someone that looks like your father/mother/parent

Please neuter/spay. 

Fun fact: I work in human service work, helping teach life skills and tackle harmful behaviors in people with disabilities. My field of work is one of the most dangerous there is, with the highest rates of on the job assaults and deaths at the hands of people we are serving. I have 88 hour work weeks AND I volunteer…

Similar to “babygate,” the puppygate can be used to prevent your dogs from entering restricted areas, such as the front living room that no one is allowed in.

Jason: And to Janet, the best robot.

Before everyone starts in on the herpes jokes, just remember that a lot of people have either simplex 1 or 2, and it’s a relatively benign condition and there should be no stigma attached to it because that prevents discussion both as a community and culture and with partners. 

I actually misread your first step and thought you meant a stick, that was on fire, and then you invite all your friends over for a neolithic fireside storytelling version of the shows that people are streaming.

Apparently not?

So Jenna Bush Hager HAD A LIFE-SAVING ABORTION and still refuses to acknowledge it that way? Cool cool cool.

Hey incel assholes: