I just looked it up, “Birdie as a sweet nickname for Beatrice, Elizabeth, Bridget, and Bertha.” I think I remember Don Draper calling Betty “Birdie” once! And Betty is short for Elizabeth. 

Ah I see, we don’t have any of those issues in San Francisco. :p

Is this a regional thing? In my 30's and never rented a room at a bar for randos to come harass me on my birthday. Potlucks, picnics, camping, dinner out, romantic dinner with partner, all acceptable birthday practices. And yes, just cozying up by yourself. But people seem to be seriously anti group fun events on Jez,…

I have never been able to taste carrot in the sauces I have made where I removed them at the end. So maybe that could be a good route?

Huh, I always take the carrots out in the end? Am I doing it wrong? I always toss two carrots cut in half into the sauce and pull them out before serving or jarring. 

I’d just walk down that hallway and out the door and never look back! Coffee over cock!

I binged the first season of Serial like everyone else, but yeah, the fan girling over Syed was appalling. Like, she legit gets excited over the things he says. She just seemed so gullible.

Ok, but they (Mcarthy and Bullock) already made The Heat! Which IMO was laugh out loud funny.

I bet he thought she was perfect because of her widely publicized fertility issues. “At least I can’t get this one pregnant.” SIKE!

Beef you say??

Beef you say??

I’m doing “low carb” but I eat tons of veggies. I don’t count, really, I just look at like a package and go, “wtf why is there so much sugar in this?!” and then go get something real. But I eat so much spinach, brussels sprouts, and asparagus. A girl’s gotta poop!! I know a lot of people count NET carbs and not total…

You can lose that amount of weight! Just lop off a few limbs.

My best friend and I took our new mother friend out for her first time post baby. She had to pump while we were at the bar, and our drunk asses were like, “Don’t waste it!” So we got Kahlua on the rocks and added her breast milk. We called it the Busty Russian.

I am just exhausted by how boring it is. It used to be more fun to watch, scrappier challenges, better lip syncs, so much more shade. Now it’s just a bunch of pretty polished queens with nothing new to bring to the table.

beautiful

I had a guy piss the bed too!! He woke me up, “Hey, I wet the bed.” He tried to blame me saying my bed was too warm (???) and refused to help me strip the bed or clean the mattress topper!!

Yo I can’t even get people to go the like four stops to Oakland from SF. But I am a hypocrite you’d have to bribe me to get on the other side of the tunnel. Haha. 

For real!! I feel like there are at least 3 other worldly beautiful women on my BART car every day. I am like, hello I am potato in your presence please let some of your glow rub off on me. If only I could get up early enough to brush my hair!

Ok wait, is $2.75 hefty???? I pay $3.50 to go 4 stops on BART. It’s like a 10 in ride. If you live in the east bay proper ONE WAY commute is about $6.45. Almost $13 a day! $64 a week just to get to work.