Goddamn, why don’t people talk about Kareem Abdul Jabbar the scholar more? The man is astonishingly well-read and conversant in a ridiculous number of things, and has a number of academic publications. Why haven’t we drafted this guy as one of our leaders in public discourse, I do not know.

SHUT UP BEFORE BETTMAN HEARS YOU.

No, she circled the wagons. And also lost four consecutive Super Bowls. Am I doing this right?

...sigh.

Nah. Give it to a kid. It’s a thing you’ll hang on to for awhile, until you forget you have it and then accidentally toss it when you move. For the right kid, that’ll be the coolest thing he owns for years, and he’ll always remember the time he got a foul ball. That’s how you make a fan for life.

Nope. The New Jersey Devils were the Colorado Rockies in the early 80s.

Thank you for providing a reason for me to tell the story of the most insane fucking thing I have ever had to do working security for NHL games.

He is. Although this virulent support for layoffs is new.

This. Very much this.

Somebody doesn’t remember the NES.

This is true. I am, uh, very familiar with Pegula Brand codes of conduct and security policies. I realize it’s theoretically possible, but 99% of the time people aren’t getting thrown out for cheering too loudly, they’re getting thrown out because they’re drunk as fuck.

Right, because weakass NFL stadium security is always throwing people out for cheering. Come on.

Jesus, this is awful. We had this happen to a junior on our varsity team when I was playing JV and it just ruined all of us. He didn’t die, but he went into a coma that he never came out of. It’s been more than fifteen years and I can still remember it vividly, whether I want to our not. Thoughts are with the kids on…

I could literally watch that all day. So damn good. Really nice kid, too!

Basically true, but this guy is less politically aspirational, if only because Andy Cuomo is less of a pushover than third term George Pataki, and he’ll stay where he is until he gets a clear shot at the Democratic nod for President or Chuck Schumer retires.

This AG is generally pretty cool in my experience, so I’m going to say it’s okay.

So we all found something to like here! Good job, team. We’re one step closer to solving racism.

The Sabres current home jersey started as a third jersey in... 2009, I think? But I’m not sure if that really counts, because it was basically a throwback, using the 1970-1995 logo with the 2007-2011 color scheme for the rest of the jersey. So, not exactly the same thing.

(That logo never should have gone away in the…

True fact: every time we get a WWE taping, show security reminds us not to kick the shit out of idiots on the field, because they are inevitably overgrown manchildren who are “just a little too enthusiastic.”

Glenn Frey absolutely is a huge dick. You could film a pre-show security briefing for an Eagles concert and then show it unaltered as a surreal comedy sketch, and it would absolutely work. The motherfucker had a LIST OF SONGS PEOPLE WERE ALLOWED TO STAND UP FOR, and we were expected to enforce it. Unless a certain…