Okay, I'm going to stop trying to explain things and try to actually help you.

I'm 24 and I say hi to every single dog I see. And sometimes squirrels. I thought was a sign of being delightfully whimsical.

whoa, let's not scare the poor woman. I'd say with a little therapy in a quality institution, they can probably stop her before she graduates to durians and things get real.

Clearly your daughter is a high-functioning psychopath. If she'd chosen a softer fruit to emulate, I'd say she's fine, but pineapples are a textbook early indicator.

Completely off-topic, but your username is amazing :D

This is just too much. Do these schools employ people that merely walked past a child development book, let alone read one? The little girl is 5. I have a 5 year old. He recently accused his 2 year old sister of being a murderer because she hit him. Should I have a profiler come by and assess my toddler daughter (who…

It's fun imagining a T-Rex trying to move blocks with their head. Lord knows they can't do anything with their short useless arms.

What about the ones that come on super strong, then ghost you once you like them back? It would be a song full of sweet nothings, then sudden silence….except for the faint sobs you suddenly realize are your own

iim sorry my first comment was confusing, I wasn't saying YOUR story wasn't real, I was saying I almost wish dinosaurs built the pyramids for satan because it sounds hilarious and badass. As in, yes I recognise your ex was an idiot and sincerely believed it, and I recognise you know it isn't true and of course I don't…

Then he told me that he felt like cutting his head off, putting it in a box, and mailing it to me.

I dunno, the bible play was pretty fucking bonkers.

We could have been very slutty sixth graders together. I dumped a boy without flinching because he wouldn't hold my hand during movie day. Those eleven year-old-boys were such prudes!

Well, it was high school. She ended up spending the entire dance with another guy because "she'd already broken up with me." I just sat at the table, weeping my teenager tears. I would have left that infernal place, except for the fact that she was my ride also.

I got this.

Things hadn't been going well with Mr. JackAss for a couple months, but I had decided to stick through it during the holidays. Then, one afternoon, he offered to let me drive his Jeep. I shifted over to the driver's seat as he walked around to the other side. I adjusted the seat, and checked the mirrors as…

When I left my abusive boyfriend, he tried to get to me via my friends. He'd tell them things, hoping they'd pass it on to me, and I'd feel bad. My friends did tell me all of the things he said, because they were fucking HILARIOUS. Our favorite was: "I howl all the time and I'm turning yellow."

Going up, my parents were were divorced and never communicated directly. I got bounced back and forth between them a lot. Always based on what my mom needed. Fuck my social life or grades or stability. If being a parent started to get too hard, she'd ship me off to live with my grandmother or father. She'd get lonely,…

I would like to believe I would always react this way - since reasonably the partner cheating on you is the one who deserves all the ire, not the person they're cheating with - but I'm not sure. It was a lucky combination of him being an asshole and me knowing he was an asshole, her being awesome and as determined to…

He took it as further proof of my demonic origin.

She got hit by a drunk driver and used the money she got from it to go overseas. If memory serves, she was going to break-up with him prior to the accident, got into the accident and he was by her bedside day and night. Very nice of him it didn't change the fact how she felt (the accident just reassured her she should…

I have a friend who did this too! Off to Australia! Guess we need to break up!
That's a really expensive way to approach things for a university student.