SHEER UNADULTERATED JERKITUDE.

You can always print out the deck from the internet! It's free on the website. That way you won't give money to the creators!

LET ME TELL YOU, I WAS LEFT IN A HOT CAR WHEN I WAS A CHILD AND I TURNED OUT JUST FINE.

I feel like somebody named Conor Oberst went to my middle school...

Oh my GOSH.

DO YOU SOMETIMES FORGET YOU'RE NOT A WIZARD and are disappointed to get back to the "Muggle" world??

DOES the government use chemicals in airplanes to control the weather??? Oh no.

That kid who's having a terrible day suddenly gets a better day when this terrifying child shows up in his kitchen and feeds him food he previously did not know existed??? I HATE THAT COMMERCIAL.

IS THIS EVEN A REAL MOVIE

he sounds like he's suppressing laughter because he can't believe what he's saying

WE'LL MISS YOU, JENNY

I'm going to become a sex ed teacher and my lessons will consist entirely of these three points. "But she was wearing—" "NOPE." "But I thought that—" "YOU WERE WRONG."

this was the first ever Reddit story I read and it was pretty good

On the bright side, now she has to wear super-great maxi skirts all the time. And what is life if you don't wear maxi skirts ALL THE TIME??

Actually, most custody agreements are settled out of court, and the parents decide that women should take care of the children.

okay but is there any way we can harvest the jellyfish and learn to eat them???

my first thought was oh gosh they'll know how much candy I buy and then immediately swore to only use cash for my candy purchases from now on

when I was about 11 I wanted a cardboard cutout of Harry Potter to stick in my room

i misread 'reportedly' as 'repeatedly'

I didn't actually know that San Bernadino was a real place until I read about it in Snow Crash. I thought it was just from this song: