The sad truth is that a state vs. state show would be a phenomenal success because Americans hate each other.

In the years since Parks and Rec left the air, I’ve had to make peace with the fact that it’s Andy Dwyer I love, not Chris Pratt.

There are truly no winners here.

Or ban stupid people.

Texas is Cruzing for a bluesing

I didn’t even know the Netflix thing was a joke. I just thought it was a comedy special or something (granted, I did not watch the video or read the info).

Bees, people, the bees are important. You will be ok in a outhouse.

Indoor plumbing.

Unlimited time off and no more student loan debt is my Sophie’s choice right now.

I cast the vote to make it 69-69!

I heard a...Radiolab?...where they talked to doctors and most of the doctors said they don’t want CPR performed on them because it has such a low chance of success. Yeah, it was this one: http://www.radiolab.org/story/262588-bitter-end/

I know it’s not wildly unusual, and was once standard, but just the idea of a 33 year old with an near-adult child freaks me out, never mind the rest of this horror show.

I would completely fill my bag with tampons in protest.

My only trip-up was Pro Hairstylists vs 70 Degree Days. I got some difficult hair.

I hope they whole-ass it.

How can it bring back the “Best part of ‘Parks and Rec’” if there’s no Ben Wyatt???

He would even call it Menta-Li-Ill if Kim suggested.

Is Joanna Explains my new favorite column? I think it is!