I have that reaction to Kevin Love. My eyeballs actually leak ejaculate.

I’m just going to say that Angie Tribeca is great “let’s eat dinner!” television.

Good sketch.

I didn’t know this. They both look better to me now.

Thanks for “contributing,” Judge Palin.

You’re not alone in thinking her music is awful.

Here’s one great reason not to use it: It is sluggish as hell.

OK, Kesha.

Fucking posers.

More examples please?

Now comes Tia Jolentino to proclaim Her Truth.

Rich Juzwiak has a new nom de plume.

I don’t mean that. I was thinking about the kind of love that traps you, becomes your oxygen. It can go a lot of different ways when that happens.

I am 100% not surprised to learn that Jennifer Lopez doesn’t know who produces her “songs.”

Loving like that is a burden.

I hate running, but thank you for being sensible.

I bet if I could see your face your face would be Ted Cruz’z face.

I don’t believe for a single fucking second that if Jia Tolentino were asked the same question on a public stage she’d so readily belch up this list of “titans.”

Good kid. Good job, parents of kid.

He needs to come sit on my lap.