"I just went to Bangor" turned out to not be a great alibi

That is much better than the couple that God has forsaken

Mel Kiper has him moving up several spots on the 2017 Big Board for already flashing NFL skills.

I don't get it.

Things would have gone differently if the kids had stolen his property for sale on the black market. Officers would have shot the market.

"show me more like war machine summons and complaint"

NO THANK YOU

So lots of tongue, got it.

He really does it to fend off the slurs hurled at him by his rival, Trey Urugay.

You had me at "pine nuts." This sounds fucking incredible.

Back to work, Donny. That GameStop's not gonna assistant manage itself.

RELEVANT!

Kareem Abdul-Jabbar blocked me in 2011 or so, even though I'd only @ replied to him once on Twitter in 2009, asking about jazz LPs (he did not respond, I think it was possibly my fifth tweet).

You know how athletes are idiots and retweet people who say things like "Hey my birthday would be the best I've ever had if I got a retweet from you?" or "It's been a tough week how bout a retweet?"

Last year David Aardsma (pitching for the Mets at the time) tweeted that his bed was stolen from his new apartment in New York (weird, right?). It happened after he blew a save, so I said if he blows one again I'm coming back for the dresser. He blew it that night, and blocked me.

God, nothing more annoying than fake twitter accounts. Or Jimmy Kimmel pranks. Both are the worst.

the ReDecision

I haven't actually posted what I want, but I think you've hit a lot of the high points. Except that I am a huge baseball fan. But, yes: more long form, more Regressing, more "actual writing" and death to auto video.

"Oh, she wasn't just pretending"

It is more likely that he gets spammed on twitter with pictures of people's junk.

[takes a shot]