The fact that Elvis Presley is considered the “King of Rock and Roll” tells you just about everything you need to know.

Actually, turns out it was both. We Minnesotans are apparently only forthright in one situation, and that’s sticking it to traitors. I’ll take that.

The Nazi stuff reminds me of my favorite story of racist war spoils: in the civil war, Minnesota sent one of if not the first (don’t recall my history too well) battalions to go fight. They were pretty good, and ended up capturing the Virginia state house, and taking its racist confederate flag. Fast forward a century…

Winter is 9 months of the year here.

WINTER IS THE WORST AND EVERYONE KNOWS IT. WHY ARE WE EVEN ARGUING ABOUT THIS?

Six minutes? Who can possibly get it up three times in a row?

If you picture these three paragraphs as the interrupted monologue from a barfly the three times you come to the bar for refills, I think that comes as close to a zen moment as I've ever imagined.

Hey, can’t people just be attracted to whatever they like, they argue. Is it really discrimination to prefer a man who is tall, dark, or handsome to a man who is short, pale, and just OK-looking? Alternately, is it really so wrong to want a woman with blonde hair and big tits versus one with brown hair and smaller…

I don’t think most people want to face up to the fact of how much their ideas of beauty and what’s appealing is influenced by society’s ideals and what they’ve been exposed to. They’d rather throw up their hands and claim what they like is inherent, rather than examine their biases and broaden their horizons. While…

C’mon. I can have a raging ladyboner over P&P and still not want to give myself pneumonia wearing a wet tissue-paper-thin dress.

I think she realizes that internet outrage is ephemeral and that the loudest voices are also the ones that will continue to support her because they never let their self-righteousness interfere with their personal preferences.

Mad Chris

Exactly. As my shitty, always losing but always drunk and having fun, softball team used to say after another inevitable defeat — we may have lost the game of recreational softabll, but we won the larger game of life because we recognize we’re just playing recreational fucking softball.

I’ve seen cops step out in front of cars who are coming up too fast (yeah, only once or twice, clearly ballsy guys) to make them pull over, too.

A book of ettiquete would have been an acceptable gift.

omg just respond already, jfc

Mississippi? Did you think about the Mississippi River? That’s a river that runs by/through Mississippi. You’d have to cross the Mississippi. I suppose you could caulk the wagon and float it across. Across the Mississipi River I mean. Because you can’t forget about the Mississippi River. Maybe you should caulk the…

The type of dude who is comfortable at a strip club is the worst. He is the guy who thinks Las Vegas is literally the coolest place in the world and goes there 4 times a year to pay $300 for a handjob.

Oh my god I’m so glad there’s a space for me to express how stupid this article is. It’s literally the exact same article papers have been writing about rich white kids in Manhattan since the 1920s, updated each year to include the new technology and trend.

Not sure if I'm allowed to say this, maybe I am, but w/e;