“Alice! Dane Cook, pay-per-view, twenty minutes. Let’s go!”

We already had a perfectly fine ninth planet. Pluto.

It’s knuckle puck time!

“shanghai”? Uhm...

Nice to see even the idiots at Deadspin have to toe the Gizmodo Media Group company line. Stick with dick jokes Magary, they suit you better.

Well, for a Gizmodo Media Group review, this is practically glowing considering the company line regarding this show/character.

He can’t take the full year off. He has to play at least six games.

I didn’t have to have The Talk with my daughter, her mother handled that. I do remember when she decided she was going to come out to me, after I had forcibly removed her from the local neighborhood house of ne’er-do-wells...she said “I’m a lesbian” and I said “I don’t care, why is your bank account negative…

I didn’t read this post. I’m not really interested in the subject material. What I would like to comment on is the choice of you (or your editor or both of you) to include the “What” in the “What the Hell” portion of this post’s headline. I am endlessly perplexed with the shortening of “what the Hell” and “what the…

One of the greatest movie soundtracks of all time.

Holy shit, can't all you nerds give it a rest and go back to playing Pac-Man or something? A lot of states have at-will employment. Employees can be fired at any time for any reason, or even no reason at all. Just the way it works. That's why it's better to keep your head low. And get rid of FaceSpace and Twatter.

Folks at Gizmodo Media Group apparently. I reckon they say it all day to each other.

I wish a motherfucker would learn English. That motherfucker being you.

No way man. It already takes long enough to get keys, especially if you’re using that vending machine in the entryway of Walmart.

I WAS THE ONLY JOURNALIST BLOGGER NERDY ENOUGH TO GO AND I’M NOT MAD

Social Distortion has been around since the late seventies. Don’t lump them in with crappy pop-punk bands please.

What?

So how did the Pistons do on the ice? Or did the Kings ditch their skates for some high-tops?

Give me and my hockey buddies five minutes with this pussy-ass baseball player. We’ll make sure he doesn’t hit another woman or baseball again for the rest of his miserable life.

Thanks for the tip on the eBay discount. I didn’t buy a Switch, but I did get four copies of Tapu Lele GX for the Pokemon Trading Card Game, for a steal!

Thanks for the tip on the eBay discount. I didn’t buy a Switch, but I did get four copies of Tapu Lele GX for the…