What the fuck is a D-list Internet celebrity?

Back when I used to work at a bar/small concert venue, we had a string of up-and-coming or slightly-on-the-downhill-side national acts roll through. I can't remember which, but one band asked for something like five cases of PBR as part of their rider. So we dutifully provided five cases of PBR in their backstage…

I call bullshit on this whole story. It's made up. What teenage boy doesn't know about torrents?

No. I'm going to say you're wrong about that. For me, it was definitely just wanting to look at Kate Upton's boobs some more, not any fucking conversation. Fuck man, who has time to talk?

I would imagine because the NBA is super-fuckin' awesome. And they can do whatever they want because basketball is such a badass sport played by the toughest athletes to ever live. The 'bos under the hoops you know, the 'bos.

1. Chocolate.

I've been hanging on to my unlimited plan for dear life.

Overpriced food, but free peep shows. Maybe Panera isn't as bad as I thought.

Are you ready to get pumped?

Yup. Patsy Cline. And anyone who gives you looks because you're listening to her can bugger off.

So, you're going back to the echo-chamber, cliquish ways of old?

I DJed for five hours the other night and I pushed buttons a lot of times...

These NBA guys can punch women, but only get into pansy slap fests with each other? What a bunch of pussies.

Dicks.

Sorry bitches, Bloodninja is my favorite wizard, not some pansy English wanker.

Dear Editer,

I'm fairly certain anyone who's ever read a comic book with Groot in it knew what was going to happen. So only spoilerific to part of the movie audience.

I've decided that my gender for today is "FA". I demand an FA box on every form there is for me to fill out today. FA stands for Fucking Awesome by the way.

I thought your term 'mansplaining' meant when a man was stating something to a woman assuming he knows more than her. This guy seems to be making commentary in general not directed towards anyone in particular, much less a woman directly. What gives?