Husband went out, toddler is asleep, just me and my rhubarb cheesecake and a nice drink.

People can be so awful!

I used to get phone calls from bill collectors for my ex-boyfriend who actually is dead. Once, his mother got a series of phone calls from the City of Oakland regarding a ticket he had failed to deal with when he lived there. After calmly informing her that he was, in fact, deceased, the lady making the phone calls…

I can only think of the time that I refused to be someone else, when a guy who’d stood me up a week earlier (because he got arrested stealing a toaster oven from Walmart using the self-checkout line) called me up and asked me to pretend to be his old boss at a cafe for reference purposes. I refused to do it and…

This is my list! I also would like to add:

Yep. I am terrible when it comes to replacing underwear. I have always been terrible. I have also had lots of sex with different people (mostly repeatedly, so I don’t >think< the underwear scared them off) and no one has ever complained, except my husband once or twice, and it wasn’t a complaint, more of a, “You…

I might never go back.

I accidentally bought granny panties a few weeks ago: I meant to return them, but I’m really lazy, so I just started wearing them and they’re quite comfortable. So what if I have to tuck the tops into my jeans?

A good friend of mine puked all over Machu Picchu. Pepto Bismol, too, so it was bright pink.

I’ve been waiting for it to open! Thanks for letting us know!

She may not have been paying attention, and assumed that he wasn’t a cheapskate. If he tucked it away in the credit card thingy, she just may not have noticed. A lot of people don’t pay attention to stuff.

I’m relieved that so many people find the eye drops thing as objectionable as I do.

I’m picking out a thermos, for you...

Shorts above the kneeeee. Yes, please.

I’m sorry you are in so much pain. Pain is so exhausting. It’s not in the same category at all, but I use beer for menstrual cramps when I don’t manage to take the ibuprofen in time for it to work. So I approve of the stout.

I like Clottisha, but I think I would have picked Clotilde as a name for a clot.

Where they going to have the twins play the same single role again? That seems really odd.

Ugh. Once, in college, I went for an annual visit. The exam room I was in had one of those “Hang in there” cat posters on the ceiling.

That was exactly my thought. I just can’t imagine risking that kind of discomfort for anything.