Müller looks like he should be wearing lederhosen in the alps or in a wind tunnel calculating aerodynamics for Volkswagen or butchering a hog to make schnitzel or literally any other smartish semi-German thing that I can’t think of right now.

Then there are the players who were once great athletes and kept playing to the point they didnt look like great athletes. Case in point, fat Ronaldo.

This is funny because I watched an interview with him a couple weeks ago and thought “Jesus, the beak on this guy!”

I like to imagine an alternate timeline where the Phillies win the 93 world series and Curt goes full Schilling. Like even more Curt Schilling then he is now.

I’d argue the wackiest sports injury would be to the eyes of anyone who watched the video of that security guard jerkin’ his gherkin but hey that’s just me.

Not disclosing that their player was in the details is awfully fitting for a team called the Devils.

When I was in kindergarten, Jaromir Jagr’s hockey card was my show and tell item. All I said was that “Jer-o-mer Jagger” is my favourite hockey player. My friends laughed. My confusion was cleared up immediately and I had not even realized I had butchered the pronunciation (grew up in a rural area and we had the dial…

Counterpoint: the US government has never been in the equality business. Obama didn’t push the boulder a few feet up the hill. He just kicked the proverbial tires.

Oh my god, those Toronto baseball fans are the worst.

Your the wurst.

Hopefully some shlub gets the “title” as the last guy to chew because this.  

Oh they grow up so fast. Now they’re on the jumbotron but they’ll be pissing in fountains, throwing chairs and getting ticketed for public disturbance before you know it.

Yeah but the one that sticks out in my mind is the “charging at Sanchez instead of giving him all the time he needs” drill.

I read the headline as refugee and was disappointed to find out that there isn’t a refugee out there somewhere who literally booted Melo over a specific grudge.

Let’s just chalk this up to a nice disgusting baseball chin.

As the French would say, in response to your headline, “Oui.”

Running is hard when you were a quarterback for a couple years 2017 years after having spikes driven through your hands and feet

[Update: They still lost.]

Watched a Canadian high school game in a blizzard once. Final score was 3-1. All rouges. Football would be better if it was only ever played in inclement weather.

Out of is actually pronounced oota.