Is the President beckoning the cancer monster into his boudoir?

Completely smooth, uncalloused, unweathered. Amazing! Like they’ve never been taken out of the box!

ONLY ONE thing needs to be done: vote in the midterms. Make it clear you’ll be voting in the midterms. We will ALL be voting in the mid-terms. And we can see who supported putting this person into office over the wellbeing of this country. We got here because people didn’t participate as voters—doing the necessary…

My thought exactly. I only wear heels on rare occasions, so I’m really not used to that spike coming out the bottom of my heel. I tried driving with heels on once and it kept catching on the floorboard. Plus the inability to press down the pedals normally.

You can buy little slippers to put in your clutch to wear when…

Perhaps this is exactly why there’s so many car accidents in Florida.

While all that is very excellent expository, I still don't get why the National Oceanic and Atmostpheric Administration would know about mermaids. It's a weather service. It knows about climate change. Oh, wait, was there something in the mockumentary about mermaids being the actual source of "climate change" that the…

Why would people call the NOAA to confirm the existence of mermaids?

The Spice is the worst chemical ever. Do not let it flow.

"Laws, like sausages, cease to inspire respect in proportion as we know how they are made." - John Godfrey Saxe (perhaps)

You know what else is "natural"? Arsenic in apple seeds and cyanide in almonds. I think "natural" is as unhelpful a label for food as "chemical" is.

Isinglass is an "old-fashioned" substance used to…

When my husband was laid off, our oldest daughter was in ninth grade attending her ninth school, my fourth grader was attending her fourth school, and my second grader was attending his second. All of the children had just really begun making close friends and getting settled in. It seemed like with each move, it was…

Milla and Michelle: A Buddy Cop Comedy, is unfortunately probably never coming to a theater near you.

I keep hearing from folks that they have automatic lights. But the sensor senses light, not wet. Unless it's raining after dark or the storm is heavy enough to block the sun, the lights aren't going to turn on. The taillights don't turn on with daytime running lights, either. And side mirrors don't have wipers on…

Why are silver cars the worst? That's rain camo color!

90 degree angle or it ain't a push-up. The challenger had much better form.

Oh that would be awesome! If I knew it would pay off to live in a tiny apartment for 5-10 years for an experience that would last me much longer, I could do it, especially if it didn't coincide with the crucial window in life to establish my career & family. If I could space those out as a woman — be able to focus on…

I want immortality so I can stop feeling guilty about feeling bored or having days where I'm too worn out or whatnot to do anything but stare at the wall.

ME: Don't put the white shirts with the rest of the laundry. You wind up with pink shirts like this one.
HUSBAND: That shirt is white.

And clown shrimp.

I get a perfect score on color tests, but trying to pick TVs drives me crazy. All I ever see is ghosting and split colors. And blue lights is freaking painful to look at. My eyes almost refuse to look at pure blue light. I do notice finer resolution and deeply appreciate it. TVs on display at stores are finally…

Nightmare fuel.