"Jag Rag: the only proper way to wipe away a child's tears."

I agree with you on all counts, but I would like to know if you also hate murdery Ray Lewis.

+1 Unrequited love is the worst.

What's crazy is the idea of an NFL head coach NOT watching a live play as it happens. If he was genuinely not paying attention, he ought to be shit-canned.

Lying about it won't make it any better, Mike. Everyone saw you do it. A one-game suspension and hefty fine is in order. Totally classless.

The average NFL crowd scene is like an apocalyptic hellscape. No wonder everyone drinks to the point of incoherence.

For once, the portrait filming was not the worst part of a featured Deadspin video.

I'm really concerned that he's facing away from the field for this because people behind him are forced to look. Also, they are at a Chargers game, which sucks.

Hey Paul, I bet you it won't.

That tackle of Vernon Davis was pretty nutty.

What did you think 2nd down would have been otherwise? Another run up the middle for ZERO GAIN? A chance to turn the ball over? There was no way that it was going to be a pass play. That kick was in Robbie's auto-range with a chance to win it, and he just barely shanked it.

in Soviet Russia, Michael Jordan's wardrobe dates him.

He outed himself as soon as he used the term fancy.

Of course I still fancy girls

Wait, he's in a relationship with ANOTHER man? Fuck it all, man! THIS IS A SHITTY WAY TO FIND OUT I'M SINGLE AGAIN!

In his defense in Canada that would have been a game winning rouge.

Having worked in television news for years

(a) Some people don't leave their home town because they like it there. Imagine that.