Well fuck me gently with a chainsaw... There’s no tongue covered in thick white fur hanging out of her mouth!!!

You do realize they come from a place were the barrier to every magic treasure cave is impenetrable can only be unlocked by mysterious and powerful rods.

Googling around to find an image for another odd duck produced a great find:

I have a sick feeling that these men who have no idea how to find a clit also have no idea that a hymen isn’t a membrane of skin that completely covers your cervix until a penis comes along and pops it like a balloon. If it was, “virginal” women could never have a period or any discharge.

It puts them all on the same level so that the virgins won’t realize how awful these dudes are at the sex thing.

Other great pics of this story from Google Images:

Like they would know what it looked like. PLEASE FOOLS you can’t even find the clitoris.

PENGUIN DIVERSITY IS A GROWING FIELD OF RESEARCH!!!! #YESALLPENGUINS

My 6 year old child and 35 year old spouse would be happy to show you!

So clearly I want to work for Harvard? Because at the large university I work at, the people who hold the reigns of the institutional credit cards WILL CUT YOU if you do not meticulously document every purchase and sign all things in triplicate.

I didn’t consider myself a massive fan but when she died, I was torn up. I didn’t realize how much hope I was holding out that she’d get herself together.

The guy’s name is a drug reference...

Not to mention the fact that she looked NOTHING like Hollywood tells us a woman is supposed to look like. She had a big nose, a permanent sneer, and ugly-ass makeup. And she _owned_ that look.

The Seventies were fun and sweet and innocent

Perhaps she thought they had a closer relationship and was excited to share her news. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Also, the references in the old Muppets were largely baked into the characters, but over the years those inherent references have kind of dropped away leaving the characters to stand alone. For example, Animal is unmistakably a reference to Keith Moon - and all that implies. Janice is a super stoned hippie. Rowlf is…

See The Muppets Take Manhattan, when he chases a woman out of a theater while shouting, “WOMAN, WOMAN WOOOOOMAN!”

If it makes the “compliments” about my “plastic surgery” from white people go away, then I’d be fine with burning it all down.

It’s like they’re thinking “People just don’t know who we are!” No, people know who you are, they just don’t understand why they should care. Hope they’re reading the comments!

Whoa, you have a 4-story Ulta? damn. I could live in a 4-story Ulta. Ours is just one level, but even that is 3 times the size of our Sephora, which can feel like a closet sometimes on the weekend.