And also, why you have to dress in a way that provokes nice young men into raping you - basically against their will.

Well yesterday a man told me at A.I Friedman, as I was stocking up on brushes, that the reason global warming happens is for population control. All governments know they can face mirrors to the sun and deflect the heat but they are heating the earth on purpose because there's just too many humans. I forgot to ask him…

Okay, um, that was rude, but that sentence was in reference to the plane being diverted somewhere else with the passengers still alive and on board. Which means they landed somewhere. So presumably they are not still at 30,000 feet in the middle of the "freaking ocean."

I mean, also, I would absolutely not notice if my plane started flying the wrong way. Of those people on board, how many would have been asleep, watching a movie, or looked out of the window and thought, "Hey, the ocean!" then turned back to watch a movie or fall asleep? I barely notice if the car I'm in is going…

Maybe they got lost trying to navigate their way through the new commenting system.

4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42. 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42.....

-> Where babies come from.

(flipside)

-> Where her head is stuck.

I just want to say goodbye and good luck to everyone before Kinja changes, in case I never see you again.

LETS.
TALK.
ABOUT.
LAVERNE.

ew ew ew ew ew

Jason Biggs is a fan favorite?

Stills? Baloney! I demand moving frames,a talkie if you will...

In my head, Lance Armstrong reads Jezebel religiously. He comments occasionally, but he's frustrated about being a grey. He's really not into the whole new Kinja thing. And he has a giant crush Lindy. IT COULD TOTALLY HAPPEN, he's got to do something with his day, how much time can being a Disgraced Cyclist really…

Dr Phil, what you're saying is imaginary creatures and... stalking? But only if you're into ladies? Should I be taking notes on this? Will it be in the midterm?

Nice to see Dr Phil encouraging men to stalk!

GLITTER SHITTER!! :)

YOU WORK AT THE ZOO???????? HOW DID I MISS THIS?????? CAN I HAVE A GOLDEN TAMARIN MONKEY??????

Ya know.. I've been wondering how to tell which of my cats keeps thinking just outside of the box. Glitter. They love to chew on the tinsely things in their feather sticks. Think of how festive the cleaning of the cat box will be.

I love this so much that I think I want to add glitter to my diet. ... for science.

Related: I work part time at the zoo and we put different colored glitters in the food of the big cats so we can see who's poop belongs to whom. So, if you are going to post about rainbow poop, next time I expect more sparkle.