• I'm trying to take a crap in here.

Ms. Ryan, when you write things like "A Gathering of the Juggalos for Rick Santorum superfans," I fall in love with you all over again.

• listening to music

Great list! I also do the following in there:

• Daydream about an automated bathroom like The Jetsons

• Dancing. I do a lot of dancing in the bathroom.

• Applying make-up

We go together so we can complain about you.

• Take lawn chair and six pack in to shower

Examining pores/obsessively extracting shit from my face. And lying to my husband about it. The red, inflamed face is usually a dead giveaway.

• Crying while huddled in the clawfoot tub because Kinja knocked me back into the gray for no apparent reason.

Not making a list (fuck the police). I take 10 minute showers that includes all of that stuff. I really hate that cliche, that women take so long in the bathroom. My boyfriend will sit on the toilet for 35 damn minutes reading reddit and I'm the one who gets blamed for hogging the bathroom? Oh hail no.

• Waiting for my body to air dry because lazy

• staring at pores in magnifying mirror

everything in this Jenna Marbles video:

• Trying to remove/bleach my stupid amount of body hair

Hunting for a new roll after the fact.

Anyone who hasn't seen this movie needs to see it ASAP.

that last paragraph hit way too close to home. i'm not paycheck to paycheck, i'm paycheck to a week and half before next paycheck

Eeeeew...mouth- mayo.