They’re two, they’re four, they’re six, they’re eight

I DID suggest the new Miata - multiple pics and everything.

But obviously, a flat four, with two separate cylinder heads or something with a spare tire on top is far easier to wrench on than an inline four that has been obsessively pared down of any unnecessary trimmings to lose weight.
#A-A-Ron-ed

I thought he was just replacing a light bulb.

Changing the timing belt, for example...

You reminded me of something from my childhood...

You just know that he beat on it.

Masochistic

Seems like there’s an issue with the tire pressure.

I’ve ridden at least 20,000km over the past 10+ years. And the only time I was bumped was when I was stupidly riding on the sidewalk and crossed the road in front of a taxi making a turn.

but bro, my fixie doesn’t have a rear quick release.

“...and am only angry they didn’t arrest more of the cyclist.”

I’m pretty sure they arrested the entire guy. ;)

Don’t ride the wrong way on the street and cut in front of cars then get pissed if one of them hits you. 95% of cyclists I encounter are just that kind of fucking hypocrite. If you are going to ride a vehicle on the street, you have to obey the traffic laws. If you aren’t going to obey the traffic laws then you have…

I see you’re trying to drive. How cute! Would you like help driving? I have over 300 behavioral templates.

but we have those, and you can signal other drivers in a festive way as well!

1st Gear:

So long, and thanks for all the intel.

You know, I have one simple request. And that is to have sharks with frickin’ laser beams attached to their heads! Now evidently my cycloptic colleague informs me that that cannot be done. Ah, would you remind me what I pay you people for, honestly? Throw me a bone here! What do we have?

Eventually, someone on Jalopnik is going to have their Craigslist ad nominated by another user, at which point the mother of all internet arguments breaks out.