Excuse me, but I believe that bear was actually named Yogi, and he only ate the kayak because he had mistaken it for a pickanick basket.

Yes because if I’m planning to blow up an airport, I’m putting the explosives in cute teeny bottles in my checked luggage and clearly marking them “TNT”

I get that she’s distraught but she’s still WAY too fucking close to that bear. If it decided to eat her before heading down for its hibernation, she would have been toast. (In Yellowstone, rangers advise people to leave a football field size distance between themselves and a bear!)

*wiggles eyebrows*

guac is extra.

All I know is:

“cheap” “tacos”

I mean,

By accepting this Project assignment, you may be required to do any of the following: appear fully nude; wear a pubic hair patch; perform genital-to-genital touching; have your genitals painted; simulate oral sex with hand-to-genital touching; contort to form a table-like shape while being fully nude; pose on all…

sounds like a Tuesday night to me.

That graph though...

Lol, “What is this gen 3!?”

And since it’s a dolphin, it only did it to hopefully have sex with her.

Russell Wilson is the regular flavored ice cream of sports. He’s a pleasant drive through Vermont. He’s that feeling you get after that foot cramp goes away. Fuck that guy.

What the holy hell is this asshole saying? I don't understand.

I’d wear the hell out of this dress.

Getting hard to find Cage-Free Prison Fish tho, TBH.

I just created an amazing blt. Now it's creating some gas.

Shades of OITNB.

I have never been prouder to be an American.