Jesus, that's horrible. Everyone knows that if you're going to criticize someone's ass, you should balance it out by leading with the carrot or at least some oats, not by throwing dirt.

"... which is called Windbreaker locally..."

Here's a movie line for ya ... "Lighten up, Francis!"

20 dollars on a PAIR? That's insane. My cheap Hanes boxer briefs do no harm to my balls, and cost like, less than a quarter of that. You spend 300 dollars on jeans, don't you?

'Those guys were the suckiest sucks who ever sucked!'

Always cut your burger diagonally

"I actually had chosen Santa Clara over two other schools I got into, Gonzaga and Marquette, because the Sharks were so close by."

You dropped this:

Are you actor Troy McClure?

He was also distraught to hear that Putin isn't fries covered with cheese curds and gravy.

I think what Lewis is saying is Colby should have went for the jack instead of exploiting the swiss defense on the left side of the infield, thereby increasing the amount of cheddar he earns in his next contract. Some of our older readers camembert Ted Williams used to do that. Like any good American would do.

Isn't it a little too early in the football season to be talking about how bad the Rams are?

[wags]

Come on, Tim. You're telling me you've never seen Cauliflower Brain before?

His attempts to recruit Lebron may have failed. But based on his profile photo, I'm surprised he couldn't at least lure Chris Anderson.