"One of his favorite things to do is put on LeBron's championship ring (he has to use two fingers)."

"Celtic Jared Sullinger kept pinning her down and would not let her up."

NCAA: [enacts bylaw 12.5.2.2]

Ah, the NCAA at it's finest. All you need is to be rich and white and you are free to do whatever. Bush, Green, Bryant, etc. should all be on the phone right now.

So if Griffin's health is x, x

Ghost Dud

Casper the Pitcher Friendly Ghost

They are such a great pair, like some buddy cop movie duo except they are both too old for this shit.

Why doesn't Matt Lauer grill politicians like this? What a joke.

IT'S "THE MAIN EVENT", NOT "THE MAIN STEVENT"!!!

Paternity leave isn't complicated. You become a father and then you leave.

No snark, I hope he does well and his knees hold up. He always struck me as a decent dude from the view interviews I remember and it's always sad when someone who clearly has talent has a career that never gets off the ground due to injury problems.

It's not like any other Alabama fans will catch it.

"I have." - Kermit Gosnell

I was buoyed by my sense of humor.

"Nice!! I still gotta figure out what to do with all these dollar bills I brought, though."

So... Paul Verhoeven was actually right about this?

As a Nebraska girl, it blows my mind that it took you four hours to go to three Targets. There are three Targets within 10 minutes of each other in Omaha. Midwest loves Target, I guess?