I'm still okay to format all of my emails in purple, cursive font, right?

heroin 3 Really, do you need a definition for this?

I think Rick Reilly's great*, especially his golf jokes.

Unstarred for not playing golf? Rick Reilly set me up!

This is what I've always believed golf culture to be, and this is why I don't play.

The NBA has no complaints, as this now allows them to sell more jerseys.

...and he never did make it to Carnegie Hall.

How can so many old people be racist when that's as white as white was in their era?

The "Kansas City No-Thank-You". Classic grift.

Those Three Stooges promo appearances are pervasive. They've got Curly *operating the camera* at sporting events, now?

100 grand to hang out with some underprivileged kids? Emilio Estevez did that for free AND he coached their hockey team to victory.

Nothing says athleticism and excitement like recreating "It's a Small World".

That was more awkward than Aces: Iron Eagle III (or am I pronouncing his name wrong?).

You can't Wiggle out of the march of time.

Or, "...not have written this 'English sentence'."

Don't tell any of those people that Rock wins at the end of movies, too.

He just wanted to fly.

This week it was a PLEASURE to be a football joke writer.

I'm sure Sean Hayes felt very comfortable in a sea of historically open-minded, intelligent people that are NASCAR fans.

It sadden me...