Rougher night to be RA Derek.

You shouldn't. "Implied risk" is gibberish offered by a guy pretending to be a lawyer on the internet.

also, he's exactly the type of asshole who doesn't see the point of being home for his family

He's probably just wondering why his favorite lamp flipped over and fell on the ground.

In a survey of Kinja posters, 1/1 called bullshit on this story, therefore 100% of Kinja users know it's a BS survey.

1000 repondents. Yeah, it's called a poll. That's how they work. By taking a representative sample. With a margin for error. Also, how is it "race baiting?"

Not necessarily useless. Potentially skewed unless you weight the demographics correctly to account for less represented groups in the sample, which a good pollster should always do.

Typical hug behavior.

And I thought the fact that I could swim the length of the local pool on one breath was impressive.

I honestly don't see the problem here. You don't deserve to play if you can't handle softball questions.

Look, I know this post isn't serious and we're on Deadspin and whatever - but please don't perpetuate that "no snitching" bullshit.

Two different countries.

NOPE TIME FOR BASEBALL

What about the non-drunkard who does not want to live in a police state?
What if I want to be left alone as I drive to work and home?

If you want to catch drunks, do that. Pull them over when they cross the center line, respond to reports to 911, don't hassle me on my way to work.

Also, baseball teams are getting huge cable TV deals, since, like all sports, they're somewhat un-DVR-able. Plus, baseball nearly twice as many games as basketball, so that's a lot more content to broadcast.

Why not listen to the entire game?

Toad is the best Mario Kart character. I always pick him. Unless one of my friends gets to him first. Then I pick Koopa Troopa and am sad the whole game.

Class Action Park! Never forgive, never forget!

Trust me, you don't want the full pipe.