Law & Order: Penis Pictures Unit has a nice ring to it.

So would it be a safe assumption that.........

Sorry, I was trying to go for strong and confident, but stay within the confines of the genre.

Can I just have wine instead?

I remember those carefree hours before we found out that Rick Perry is literally Satan. How young we were. How happy.

The Vietnam war was classic instruction on how to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. That war was an example of why, once you have decided to unleash your military, stay out of the way and let them fight. War isn't pretty and no sane person would want it. But fact is, war is about two things. Breaking things and…

I don't know, this is totally failing to get my hackles up. Are they supposed to be up? Because just replace "girlfriend" with "boyfriend" or "significant other of whichever gender and sexual persuasion you happen to prefer" and it's like...yeah, most of that shit is pretty annoying.

Haha. Unfortunately that is my genetic legacy. Hairy legs, no chest hair, facial hair that will not grow a full beard. At least I kept a full head of hair after 30 though. :)

God, I hate the mommy wars. Nobody wins and everybody looks stupid.

HPV is an obnoxious, fickle, determined bitch. I say that as someone with a resistant cancer-causing strain. It's really, really helpful when well known and highly visible people mention that their cancer is related to HPV.

Keep talking, boys. The Hyper-Mega-Unicorn Matriarchy is putting names in The Book. See if you can out-biology the new world order.

Men read self help books too. Like this classic:

Oy meshpuchah, trust me, someone would find out. Jacob's great aunt Rita will be looking for you, to tell you she wanted you to take some of her daughter's old shoes, because her daughter moved out and apparently thinks it's her mother's responsibility to get rid of her stuff. She's so ungrateful. And Rita won't be…

"Local Infant a Hero After Stealing Bad Wolf's Mic"

I'm going to blatantly copy/paste something I saw on my Facebook feed today, but it's very accurate, especially the last part about how the only hands you see helping and saving people are human hands.

"It’s an unpopular topic in many circles, but in the aftermath of the devastating tornado that ravaged Moore, Oklahoma…

I -like- this article—primarily because it grapples with the indefensible nature of the term "slut." I've often heard it said that a woman has, "acted slutty," or, "dressed slutty," because she was being flirtatious or her clothing revealed her cleavage (*gasp!* *shock!* *MORAL INDIGNATION!*), but I rarely hear of…

You know what I have to say to the fact that they used the wrong gif?

Bathing, clipping your nails and brushing your hair can be done for cosmetic reasons but they are also done for sanitary reasons. Shaving is about conforming to society's standard of femininity and beauty. There are no health or sanitation reasons to shave other than to change your appearance.