Along those same lines, I love me some Frisky Dingo. The Flowers for Algernon, Harrison Bergeron, Tom Bergeron, Agamemnon scene absolutely slays me every time.

I just re-watched those with my mom. She likes to pretend she's "above" that type of humor, but I heard her laugh every time someone said "Nikolai Jackov.....Head of the KGB."

Beer all day on the golf course. Now delicious, delicious gin and Archer.

I won a golf scramble at my buddy's bachelor day/party. What makes this noteworthy is that I sliced 12 of my 18 drives out of the fairway (I lost 8 balls. Damn narrow course/my own incompetence), and we still went 9 under. This was accomplished because my two teammates are scratch golfers; one of whom regularly drives…

I feel you BoC.

How do you know that Pusha ghostwrote it? Just an educated guess? Because that's one of the first things I thought when I listened to the record was how he seemed to have jacked Pusha's flow through osmosis. And I know that Kanye's never been the best lyricist, so it wouldn't surprise me.

No. My jokes suck extemporaneously. HOWEVAH, I do have jokes in my mind for events that haven't happened yet that would kill. Not even kidding. I'll think, "Man, if only there was some story with Roger Clemens, apes, and a girl named Cheryl I would have the perfect line."

This seems pretty topical.

I mentioned this in DUAN, but I lived really close to the corner of McFarland and 15th for the last two years. It's going to be really weird going back next month and surveying the damage. I just pray that it didn't touch Nick's in the Sticks or Archibald's.

It absolutely obliterated 15th Street. Until a few months ago I lived on 15th Street in Tuscaloosa. I heard that Milo's, Hokkaido, and Full Moon were flattened. Thankfully, I've gotten in touch with my old roommates/most of my close friends, but damn.

We'd love to know if the Yankees have contacted you regarding the breach, and what they've offered to do to fix it.

I bet she was really broken up over the passing of Bary Goldwater, too.

I agree. I'm a huge soccer fan, but shit like that drains so much of the enjoyment from the game. Plus, whenever you try to introduce soccer to a skeptic and then someone crashes to the ground like they just took a sledgehammer to the face, it just reinforces prejudices.

I second that. We do not deserve to be here. Even if we lose in OT, I have to tip my cap to Crawford; kid's been standing on his head.

We have absolutely ZERO business being in overtime right now. I can't breathe. Need more beer.

If you have any questions about absolutely anything send me a PM through the ca.deadspin.com site. I graduated from 'Bama last May and I'd love to help a fellow Deadspinner out.

Single Chimay Blue (long gone) segueing into the current six-pack of Bell's Oberon Ale. The Blackhawks poor play is causing me to go through the sixer a little quicker than I'd originally hoped.

Yeah. Stupid goal, too. We keep getting caught while making changes this series. We're lucky that's the first time it's really bitten us.

See I had to take a little physics for my degree, but all I have is a BS in Cellular Biology. I am going to a pretty decent law school, though, so hopefully that'll open a few more doors in the way your Caltech degree probably did.

Did you have a science-based background before you went into patent lit? I have a hard science undergrad background and every professor I've talked to has asked me if I'm interested in patent law. But from what I've heard just having a BS isn't all that much to lean on.