Love my country, but rooting for a gas explosion at the next debate.

No worries, it’ll be a teetotal evening. Anyhow my nephew, who will be in the car, just did me a huge favor which is destined to lower my blood pressure and prevent heart disease. He volunteered to take my ticket to the Bills game this Sunday.

I’ve been elected designated driver to a New Year’s Eve party which will start at 10 PM and go on until at least 3 AM. No chance of getting a cab, and cops blanketing the roads in our little jurisdiction. Should I: a) drink all the alcohol I can by 11, in order to sober up enough by 3, or b) imbibe lightly throughout…

Chip Kelly was the worst GM in football

+5/7/5

No worries. I have season tickets and can assure you that by the time the game ends, no one there will be capable of operating a lighter.

Apparently boners are contagious, Tim.

What’s the over/under on football pundits taking the Peyton-would-never-do-that approach? I’m guessing 1247 1/2.

Ha!

You don’t sneeze on your Bingo cards.

Pretty weak entry here, but I awarded the Ugly Sweater Prize to a woman who didn’t know we were having a contest and thought that her sweater was nice.

...most closely resembles Russian serfdom

Are we sure it’s Rob? Guy looks like every Bills fan from Erie to Webster.

I’m shocked that the bottle detached from the podium.

Missed the first quarter of the game in order to watch A Charlie Brown Christmas with the boys. Tuned into the game afterward. Quoting my oldest: “Of all the Cleveland Browns in the world, these are the Cleveland Browniest.”

Jeez. All these stories make my toenail clipping seem absolutely pedestrian.

We all did.

+1

It’s weird that any Knicks fans would have cognitive dissonance from losing games in creative ways

If you’re in the northeast, you could do worse than a Beak & Skiff 1911 .