To be fair, that's one of the more difficult levels in Paperboy.

It annoys me more that it's in quotes, like it's a pun or a reference instead of unfettered stupidity.

can someone please fire this whole conversation into the fucking sun

"It's called Air Blade. It's about a champion sprinter, but get this: He has four artificial legs and is a golden retriever!"

Joe Kocur is about as much of a Detroit Red Wings "Legend" as I am a Deadspin commenting legend.

Any fan who thought the large beer was a better deal and shelled out $7 for the 20 oz. beer instead of paying $8 for two 16 oz. deserves what they got.

Unfortunately that was the last time the Browns had anyone to drive them down the field.

Unfortunately, we do not know why Francisco Garcia was walking around a cactus plant without any shoes on. That does not seem like a very wise thing to do.

Didn't you just write an article admonishing us not to watch second-rate soccer?

TL:DR = Rick DiPietro

This writer is obviously a butthurt NBA and most likely LeBron fan. Sorry dude dont blame hockey fans for calling out the truth. The NBA and LeBron especially is a league full of pussies. Even Soccer players are tougher than these "Athletes".

Found the answer to my own question. From Backhand Shelf:

That would make him the only Astro who could even come close to hitting 315.

The story was quickly picked up by the Seattle Times, the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, the Seattle Courant, the Seattle Star, the Seattle News-Journal, and the Oregonian.

I would propose removing one player from each team while increasing the length of the OT period by 1 minute.

This gives me hope that Deadspin will run the 18,000 word article I wrote about the time the fascist Nazis at O'Dooligan's Irish Bar & Grill DQ'd me from the Thursday Night Nineball tournament on the flimsy pretext of having my foot slightly off the ground when I shot the winner, when really it was all about how…

One step further than my comment. +0.5 since it's just USWNT soccer

Who cares about this when there is EPL and La Liga to watch?

Hey Billy—what are you doing watching the USWNT? Don't you realize there's better soccer to be watched with more intricate passing and better control. Or is it that you do, indeed, like frog eggs on the local menu?

"When current Nike superstars Shalane Flanagan, Will Leer, and Lopez Lomong".