“An ejection in three minutes? Finally, something I can beat that guy at!”

“We’re talking about celebrity stuff, not politics.”

The federal budget deficit has declined every year from 2009 to 2015 already.

Did the approximately five seconds of bliss equal the unknown amount of time spent apologizing? (Probably not.)

Wow. If voodoo economics can’t work in Louisiana...

Albert Brooks had a bit about radio guys and summed them up perfectly that on a scale of awfulness you’ve got “Non-contagious lepers, FM Radio DJ’s, then contagious lepers.”

It’s impossible to go over the top with the performance

“...that’s the way this amateur sports league is set up. We’re supposed to be having fun, but all the money is in these basketballs that colleges play with. But it’s an amateur sport, we’re just here for fun. It’s not really that serious. So I guess any ball should be OK. [...] But in this amateur sport of college,…

I thought he learned to stay out of k-holes.

So, it looks like we’ve finally discovered what it takes to get the police to prosecute someone for accidentally shooting a black man.

Why must you turn this comment section into a house of lies?

+1 sack of door knobs

It makes me feel like a big man.

Videos kill radio stars.

More beautiful than that? Televised sports without commentary! What's your secret??

Back.... and to the left.
Back.... and to the left.

I believe that flop has been dubbed, “The Paella”, because it is universally panned.