@petecarroll: ✈️✈️ 🏢🏢 + 💣💣

Each subsequent link is made to eat Skyline Chili, instead of poo.

There isn't a better beard around the Seahawks than Ragnar's. Well, except for Ciara.

Russell Wilson: [cums]

Luck probably overreacted due to the fact that he had his son in his Week 2 DraftKings lineup.

Luke McCown would take over at quarterback, and be as capable as a McCown can be.

Buffalo Wild Wings Bartender: [flips switch that causes the first half of next week’s game to continue forever ad infinitum]

I’m new to the whole corporate world, office building, and cubicle work style, having only been at my current job less than two years with retail experience before this. There are a lot of meetings, I’ve noticed. It just so happens that before one of these meetings, well, I pissed myself.

Tho I did get so drunk at a wedding once that I pissed my pants, then the hotel bed, then the closet. #trifecta

Pissing myself isn’t all that much of an event, tbh.

One time, I played hockey stinkin’ shitfaced because my wife, Louise, left me. Some Princeton grad threw me against the boards, and I pissed all over myself.

New Years Eve Party at a friend’s house like 4 years ago (mid-20s, pathetic) I pissed all over my pants when I fell asleep. I was sleeping alone in the room and when I woke up and realized my fuck-up, I noticed there was a mostly empty beer can on the floor. My friends always make fun of me for pissing myself, but to…

The picture is a little blurry so it was nice of them to blow it up.

“After what we experienced with Aaron Hernandez, I really just started to think Trump has a lot of good points,” said Brady.

I find the unrelenting passage of time to be alarming as well so I’m going to have to side with the police on this one.

Manning continued, “That being said, I will be having spinal reconstruction surgery Wednesday afternoon to fuse six of my vertebrae together.”

“Buffalo Bills general manager Doug Whaley said he had the same results when he asked prospects a question about defenses shifting from a common scheme called “cover 2” to an equally mundane tactic called “cover 3.”

Hopefully those John Jay kids will be brought to Justice.

ETFs are pleb tier bro.

Barry, to be clear, this is 1995 in Canada. Which I can tell you from experience is like 1987 America.