Wasn’t Kate Hudson rumored to be fucking Nick Jonas earlier this year? Nick Jonas is 24. Brad Pitt is 52.

Picturing Liz Hurley sitting sadly, watching her family eat pizza, while eating a dry piece of toast and a parrot mocking her intermittent moments of joy maybe one of the funniest things I’ve done today.

I’m hoping they won’t be successful enough for their names to be used at all.

No, because even in their— let’s just be frank, evilness- they’re just second rate hacks who have no original ideas.

That is a very good question that would make an honest woman feel shame. But not Kellyanne, the plucky, gaslighting fascist traitor to her gender. She turns around and shames a teenager for asking it.

Honey, when you belong to an organization and a movement that has vandalized clinics, that has threatened doctors and patients, that has killed doctors and clinic workers, that harasses the children and families of clinic workers, and that intimidates people to scare them out of obtaining a legal medical procedure,…

Let’s start slow will these violent, bomb-throwing dickholes. Will they grudgingly concede that water is wet?

Jeez, she SAID she was sorry. Are we going to bring up that whole “domestic terrorist” thing forever?

(5) the term “domestic terrorism” means activities that—

I object to the word violent too.

Fetus is not an infant, morons

Death of the mother and doctor: a loving alternative to abortion.

Kate Middleton is the patron saint of Basic.

Can we stop criticizing Mitt for going for SOS? He’s sane, competent, and qualified-qualities sorely lacking in most of Trump’s cabinet picks. Also, he’s at least somewhat willing to criticize Trump, at least enough to completely unhinge Kelly Anne. I take that as a good sign.

I feel like we are in an alternate timeline. Everything was going great and somewhere between august and November something went wrong.

Neveruary.

On the other hand, if Kasich had accepted Trump’s (alleged) offer to be his VP, we might be in slightly better shape.

I really wish people would stop treating racism and misogyny as “a different side of an issue” or as a “different point of view”. Not every topic has two valid sides. If you’re talking about child molestation, you don’t go out and find people who believe molesting children is totally ok and treat them the same way as…

I stopped going to office parties a long time ago. Seriously, even free booze isn’t enough to make me want to spend more time with folks I see almost every fucking day in a work capacity and most I don’t really like anyway. In fact, why waste my buzz on them?

Alright, so a God Damn millennial here. Honestly, at the end of the day, it’s not the ones that idiotically wrote in Sanders or voted Stein I take issue with. Perhaps it’s because I live deep in a red state, which to be frank is quite the neverending hellscape when it wants to be, but the ones that really fucking piss…