To this day, I think Texas is proof Mexico ultimately won the Mexican-American War.

Counterpoint. Go Fuck Yourself.

But John Terry really is a cunt.

The school’s president fears this could hurt the young man’s chances of becoming one of their many fine graduate bus drivers.

but nowhere near as high as Dock Ellis.

It’s the NFL. They’d more likely go with Art Garfunkel (no Simon), The Bee Gees, and fucking Kesha.

Okay guys, where in the hell is the Pats WYTS!? My erection is on hour five and it’s really starting to hurt.

Somewhere right now there’s a NFL rep asking if Sha Na Na is available.

Wanna bet their gonna do some fifty years of music bullshit?

False. We simply make more fat kids become pitchers.

Counterpoint. The Finals that year featured the goddamned Knicks.

I will not live in a world in which I don’t get to see Colon bat. Nonnegotiable!

Considering the NL Central has 3 of the 4 best teams in baseball and yet only one will get to play for the pennant, I couldn’t care less what it does to the scheduling.

Good, now do the same in baseball and hockey.

Are you certain that the Temple tapes aren’t Sandusky at a Bar Mitzvah?

Me two

He suggested Manziel start, violating the league’s substance abuse policy.

Luckily, Bradford and Sanchez will fill that role.

Capitalists*