Marlo Thomas and Alan Alda! God, I loved that song.

Gray area.

And have no one believe them when they do get it.

But..but...wow, burying my mom may have been a HUGE mistake. (Sorry— gallows humor is how I cope with life.)

Are you sure? You may be making it up. (On a serious note, get well quickly, please, and laugh at whatever the hell you want to. It will make me feel better for laughing, too.)

Blueberry muffin batter is amazing, too. Also, cornbread batter— a wonderful accompaniment for chili or soup. Damn, I am so hungry.

You’re not getting a Waffle House until NY gets an In-n-Out. Get in line, dammit.

Someone makes those at our local farmers’ market, and I swear, you can see the aroma, cartoon-style, leading customers to their stand.

Oh God, gumbo. You’re killing me here. I miss my mom and her gumbo so. damn. much. But where is the okra?

If you aren’t instantly murdered by some sort of giant, venomous moth, that is.

I hate that phrase. It’s like a mantra for the anti-vax crowd.

Sometomes I make Gruyere twice-baked potatoes for dinner on meatless nights. Gruyere is the best. And your pumpkin recipe sounds amazing.

That is a crime against cookware, and I admire your reatraint.

Right? Not Contracts or Torts, but Law. Just Law. As read by a springer spaniel.

My kids got me these for Christmas a few years back. They are super cute.

It makes a great press for a grilled cheese sandwhich, though— makes it turn out super flat and crispy.

Yikes. I’m sorry. My mom was a bit nuts (and a bit ill-addled), but not that bad.

So wait, is your mom homocidal??

I was madly in love with sad-kicked-puppy Ralph Macchio in The Outsiders. Swoon!

We’d have to make that a civilian-only rule. It would make military operations difficult.