I agree with most of your statements, but you are on one extreme end of the scale. “Don’t people ever want to retire?” paired with “I want to retire at 50" are two vastly different things.

If i’m not mistaken, the exact road is just to the left of the third hole at Spyglass Hill.

You mean 9,111 auctions for 911's in various states of condition ranging from “that’s the most beautiful Porsche I’ve ever seen” ($750,000) to “even if I spent $50,000 restoring it, it still might not be road worthy” ($75,000)

Nick, is this you? A buddy of mine after college told us the exact same story when we were out one night and we were laughing so hard I almost puked.

This is a trick by the owner of said bargain lot to be able to drive a Bentley around town without having to actually pay for it. “This is a business expense! I’ll just write it off!” While also not having any idea what a write-off actually is.

Suicide doors on a truck looks pretty bad ass.

Timeout! Why is he wearing Nike’s?!?!

WHAT IS THAT BLACK FERRARI?!?! Without those weird side gills that would be gorgeous. I WANT THAT

I sent this to Patrick yesterday assuming that it would inspire Tavarish, but it makes me so much happier that Patrick put his own spin on it.

Crapdangit made me spit out my water. Amazing what a well-placed, ridiculous, made-up word can do for a guy.

Did I miss something? I have seen a number of RS 5's out and about.

*None of the Jalopnik writers know how long a hockey stick is*

We discuss this way too much for it to be healthy in our office, but....

Barry,

We had so much fun when we did this a few years ago. Well worth the extra $500 to crush the car.

OR.....they are about to release the first silver car with a red reflection! BREAKTHROUGH

Honest question: is #9 Johnny Manziel?

Barry,

How dare you forget the ultimate Caps puck slapper, Al Iafrate.

Is this at Drive A Tank in Casota, MN? If so, I did this a couple years ago and it was pretty awesome. We got to drive 3 different tanks and then for an extra $500 we got to drive the giant tank to crush the car.