This is just the type of trite baloney Scotland jezzies can talk about at the second gathering if we opt into gather. Please do come and gather!

That’s so true. For me, part of it is that I am a high self-monitoring introvert, and I feel more at ease when I adapt to different situations. Part of it is also just avoiding vulnerability; I don’t feel like everyone is entitled to my most authentic, private self, so I have a bit of an everyday face that I wear out…

Also: Big Boo.

WE HAVE FOUND RAFFEY.

Laughing at a menstruating woman = virgin

any dude that notices also doesn’t care, if they are over the age of, like, 23.

More than once I have discovered that friends’ boyfriends didn’t really like me, or at least didn’t get me, until they were around me when I was drunk!

The Simpsons

my dad had me watching ren & stimpy straight from the womb. wildly inappropriate, but awesome. sometimes he'll still text me something along the lines of STIMPLETON YOU EEEEEDIOT

If you've never met a woman with whom you can talk about a variety of interesting, engaging topics, you've either been extremely sheltered or you're not good at conversation.

This was SO ME at my first year of college (where I went on scholarship and financial aid for one year before transferring to a state school where I attended for free to save even more money) One girl couldn't believe I was flying home only once a year and on COACH, when private leasing was such a more convenient…

Classism can also be a big, nasty issue between the college and the town it inhabits. This is a huge problem in Oberlin, for example. Wealthy elites of the college vs. poor townies. Even at a school that cultivates (or at least used to) an atmosphere of absolute anything-goes liberalism, the divisions between kids…

For all the guys who think it's helpful to add "personally, I like small boobs" to this discussion: this is an interesting counterpoint to that tired response. Also:

Your comment puts into words one of my greatest fears: that my expressionless kid will be suspected of a crime for no other reason than he doesn't behave the way people expect him to behave.

Bring it, Lil BUB.

Here's what happened to me: my mother in law bought me a lace thong as a gift. Then my husband and I were prepping the turkey, and rinsing it off, and he dropped it into the bin and doused me head to toe in raw turkey water. My mouth was open. Then, day of show, my in laws (3 of them) took a combined total of 8 shits…

So exciting to see GT's own Burt writing a dirt bag! I knew you before you were famous, so when you get super famous I can be the source or "old friend" who gives weird quotes to tabloids. YES!!!

This article better be from the cat's perspective.

I love anything that defines success as a very unique and personal experience, rather than this really unhealthy "you must be the best!" life hacker-style attitude many people seem to have adopted. I saw an incredibly depressing comic once where a man's life with a consistent job, family and various activities was…