It’s a shame. Getting blackout drunk is the only way I could imagine tolerating a Landover game.

True story - what’s even sadder for that beer vendor is that his job doesn’t even provide enough to allow him to go back to his home in Kansas to visit his father. His dad had to use some of his retirement savings to travel to Landover just to be able to see his boy.

does this post actually make no sense to anyone else?

Fuck it, just trade him to the Patriots for a conditional 2023 6th round pick and get it over with.

“I lay there, annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart...

Let me guess: the fucking Patriots are going to get him for a song.

And he won the popular vote!

Legend. If you’re gonna quit, quit. Don’t wait.

I love that he just up and quit. It’s just a job. If you don’t need the money, and you don’t like the work, then don’t do it. 

That means he's smart.

Needless sensationalism. Zane Gonzalez also walked away from his NFL career at halftime today, but you don’t see anybody making a big deal out of it.

A cake made in the mold of winstons hand/fingers 

You can’t “steal” a QBing job. You win it through hard work. It’s not like it’s a crab leg.

It took him that long to realize he was on the Bills? 

He missed no plays? So they conducted a concussion assessment fast enough to keep him on the field without missing any time?

I love bagels and have since I was a kid, so there is some bias with my take, but I wholeheartedly disagree that bagels are “an extremely just ok food.” If that’s your take, you have never had a good bagel (and good bagels exist outside of NY, but they are harder to find) or you have never been hungover and been saved…

Look at that big ol’ raisin over there. It won’t let you forget!

I have a friend who orders pork roll, egg, and cheese on a blueberry bagel.

Truly excellent kinja 

I already trust Jim Tomsula more than any guidance counselor I had in middle/high school.