“When Michelle and I came into office....”

Goddamit Kim, now Jesus has to pick up the slack since there’s one less person in the office. He’s definitely not going to be able to slide out early the Friday before a 3 day weekend.

Oh, the Supreme Court? The Supreme Court that ruled that gay marriage was legal? That Supreme Court? Good luck with that, you ignorant fuck.

Man, he’s gonna be pissed when someone reads this article to him.

They’re little Foodie Howsers, CNS.

The biggest silver lining to all of this is Arby's reaction:

"Those of us at the live taping were shocked when he announced his resignation."

That name escaped me, thanks for the reminder. Funny how it was the '76 Olympics where all the women were subjected to sex tests to determine if they were "truly" women, except for one woman, Princess Anne, whose mother, the Queen, was on hand to open the games in Montreal.

Is that a No More Wife Beater?

There are two wonderful things happening here in this story:

To: all of those saying we should not be praising Hebdo and his organization because they ridiculed already marginalized groups. NO, THEY DID NOT. Their targets were the same as any satirist; tyrants, blowhards, and hypocrites who preach hate instead of following the tenets of their own religion. No peace loving…

I think Ross Douthat, of all people, actually had the best response to this:

Upon receiving notice that Michael Sam beat up his boyfriend, he was subsequently re-instated and appointed team captain.

I've started to notice the people that say "Don't tell me how to raise my kids!" are the exact people that need to be told how to raise their kids.

The Vikings could always pull a switcharoo, which Adrian Peterson believes to be beating the hell out of a wallaby.

panties OFF.

Ugh. Everyone knows you fake amnesia, not death! Gawd, millennials, get your shit together!

It wasn't Carmelo. He wouldn't even pass gas.

Game. Set. Matches.

Seems more fitting now than ever that Blake's tennis hero is Arthur Ash.