In an unexpected turn of events: New Pope is way better than Classic Pope.

That's exactly why I didn't post the link, y'all.

I'm not going to post it here, because I don't want to cause undue trauma. But if you love being grossed out, go to Reddit and search for "25-year-old blackhead removed." Sick fascination and satisfaction all at once.

I've always been conflicted about how much I enjoy looking at pictures of celebrities' kids, especially Jennifer Garner's or Angelina Jolie's. They're tiny, they're adorable, you don't have as much opportunity to see them.

Just now, on the heels of that, I thought, "like cheetah cubs at the zoo." Which lead to the…

Agreed. I don't care if you are a fashion maven, putting anything under a portrait collar ruins the whole look.

I read a Reddit post by a guy who was actually at the Chappelle performance. Basically it boiled down to a bunch of entitled, disrespectful douche canoes not piping the fuck down so Chappelle could perform. He refused to utter a word until they shut up. They never did. So he left the stage.
Could he have handled it…

If you haven't seen A Long Kiss Goodnight, please, pleeeeeeeeeeease do yourself a favor and watch it. So good. Especially when shit starts coming back to her and she goes from housewife to rocking the platinum bob and black eyeliner...so badass.

I swear to Vishnu, I'm not just picking on her...but Lena Dunham, CLOSE YOUR MOUTH. I can't stand when women think the only way they can look sexy in pictures is to have their mouths hanging open.

Goddamn it I want her wedding dress!!

Maybe it's because I'm used to guys being jerks online, or maybe it's because I'm a grammarian, but the thing I find most offensive about this ad is the excessive use of quotation marks.

I really, really want tomorrow's Dirt Bag to feature a story about how Tami Erin decided to escape the whole porn kerfuffle by flying off in an autogyro powered by herself and a broom while singing "Runnin' Away."

A company that sells cheaply made clothes for cheap prices being cheap about insurance? Balderdash!

At first I was like, "Robin Wright is dating Ben Foster??" as well, because I remembered watching Flash Forward on the Disney Channel during really boring summer days. Then I remembered that was when I was in high school, and he's 33 now. Now I just feel old.

Robin, though...damn, get it girl!

So...that would be a no on the Bloody Marys at the Stephanie Meyer/Anna Breslaw brunch. Bellinis for everyone!

It's a Bitchy Resting Face-off!

Anna Wintour is a creature of severe habit, I know. But that hair is awful. She looks like an ostrich in a wig. She needs something either softer or shorter.

"I'm going to have to ask you to stop talking to my wife. If you want to do something else about it, call the cops. Thank you, goodbye."

Husband WIN. Also, both parents taking their kid to a dance class with a 16-day-old baby. I sincerely hope to have that kind of marriage and that kind of active family life. Even if…

LUNA! I love it so much, I now want to name my hypothetical girl child the same thing!

I'm a size 4, and I absolutely refuse to wear Lululemon anything. It's just such elitist bullshit, not only in terms of size, but in terms of money. I live in Chicago, where hordes of women with truckloads of disposable income can be seen wandering the streets on weekends in nothing but Lululemon gear. You can be cute…

It warms my cynical little heart to see Lindsay Lohan looking so healthy and happy. You go, Glen Coco, you go.