Dana Loesch- how much do you want to bet she jogs around her gated community in camouflage workout gear?

Jeff Bezos?

Guys, I think this fact robot might be broken

Republicans who will not impeach this person are the worst traitors in the history of the world.

Seeing as how North Korea is already looking for ways to not have this meeting, I’m actually not all that worried about Trump not putting in any work. Since this was all a dog and pony show anyway, the only way Trump could possibly fuck it up would be to cave to all of Kim Jong-un’s demands and... Oh shit, that’s…

“Horton, Here’s a Poo!”

Meh, I’d rather get rid of the whole area south of the Ohio River and east of the Mississippi, but that’s just me.

I went through a phase of drinking a similar version of this: vodka, orange juice and sprite. It’s not bad.

I’m pretty sure it’s on the album, and the remix actually isn’t, as far as I remember...? Haven’t listened in a while to the full album, though (as solid as it is).

You’re talking about this -

I bet you got too drunk by half.

You got too many halves there.

It’s what plants crave!

electrolytes are important

vodka and cherry coke was the cheapest I’ve gone

Keeping your keys in car is a smart move. Nothing kills a party like some bartender confiscating them because youve had like 15 drinks or whatever

It’s NOT?!?

“you need to acknowledge jesus as your savior to believe anything” “frozen is part of a cultural marxist conspiracy to destroy western men” “all women secretly want to be brutalized by muslims” and “it is good for a child’s development to be thrown off the monkey bars by a strange adult if they are insolent on the…

I actually left a beat for “Act like it.” As if I were allowing proper space to devastate her.

I usually find that my face desperately needs a wash after driving around in my rented, gorgeous little convertible, a bright cherry red Buick Cascada. But I always wait to get back to my room at the Fairfield Inn & Suites to wash up, because they have the best free soaps and lotions.