Kryptonite in book form. Jeepers.

Oooh, one day when I have a house with bookshelves again I will buy these books. Until then, I read a book and I give it away to someone who I think would like it.

I like to read my classics on PBS and BBC.

The Fountainhead? Hahaahahahahahaahaa! No.

...The Fountainhead?

My favourite bit in Pride and Prejudice is the bit where Colin Firth and Hugh Grant fight in the fountain. Jane Austen - what a genius.

I would give them kudos if they all quit. And that ain't going to happen. So, not so much.

This is what you all get for trying to be all 'healthy' and 'eat right.' You don't hear about people getting sick from a bad batch of poisoned Vodka, do you? No. But on there other VODKA SAVES PUPPY LIVES.

Craggs: CHRIS KLUWE YOUR POSTS GENERATE OPTIMAL PAGE VIEWS. WE WOULD LIKE YOU TO CONTRIBUTE AGAIN. RESPOND.

I get so tempted, but I'm torn. You're already ruining my morning and now I waste my coffee on you? Ugh.

DISCLAIMER: You should never meet violence with violence buuuttttttt

What's so infuriating is that I'm too afraid to say boo to creepy-ass dudes who catcall because I don't know what they're gonna do. I might say "go fuck yourself" to some creeper and I'll end up in a shallow grave somewhere. It's, in my view, an unnavigable situation.

That's why the best gift is cold hard cash.

Fer real

I am not super into the mullet dress trend, but Lily Collins' dress is still far better than Bella Thorne's, with or without the mullet hem.

Yeah I got in a Twitter argument with them one time. I felt sad afterward, like I'd just gotten in a fight over a Forever 21 cardigan with a member of AARP.

Nope, mine was guilt free. Right choice for me, and not even a hard one (aside from being quite expensive). It's hard for some people, it's easy for others. Everyone's a snowflake.

Dude RIGHT!? I'm like "oh hey look how cute I am BUT MY BUTT IS COVERED HAH!"

maxi dresses are warm.

Okay, so here's the dope on male partners from someone who's in her 50s and has been married three times and has seen more than two sides to the story...