I'm not sure the author made the leap to rape culture. I wouldn't make that leap. I know that Kate made the point that women in cities are taught to stifle emotion on the street, but pointed it out in a negative light, that she didn't agree with it.

I agree, I think "nice" is actually one of the worst things you can say about someone. To me it means they have no personality, or that their identity is derived from how much people like them (ie not making waves).

I've been thinking a lot about "Don't feed the trolls" with respect to feminism. I get that it may be internet etiquette, but I think in terms of feminism it requires something different, especially given the expectation that women should not respond to criticism.

Yep yep yep! I'm actually less likely to smile at a person in authority over me unless it's someone I actually like.

I think "nice" often gets conflated with "polite" and "considerate" and "kind." Nice is about pleasing others and not making waves, whereas the others about about thinking about others as well as oneself.

I smile a lot, particularly at people I don't know who I encounter in service industries. I do it because you never know what kind of day someone is having, because I like to be friendly, because the person behind the cash register or the reception desk is probably dealing with assholes all day. I've never thought…

I haven't watched Supernatural because I scare easily, but I liked Dean in the beginning and it just went downhill from there.

That is so sweet!!!

Hey now. Kim is married.

I love the Gilmore Girls throwback, but Jared Padalecki is a giant.

I don't quite understand why you're being so combative but okay. I have plenty of "basic social tact" and don't find it oppressive at all...

Then just say you don't want to spend money on wedding presents. But wrapping it all up in "asking for x is tacky and asking for y is tacky" and some idea of class feels disingenuous to me.

I grew up in a house with ONE closet in my parents bedroom. No linen closet, no broom closet, nothing. My mom would keep getting dressers and chests and armoires to put stuff in, and my dad would just fill them with his stuff.

I accept and applaud your addition.

Absolutely.

Hey, I'm not against registries at all! If that's what setting up your life means, then you do you!!

Okay but none of this is at all the point.

This comment is particularly hilarious given that you started this entire thread with absurd outrage. Keep it up.

Yeah why the fuck are they so huge?

I would say at least 50% of the things on most wedding registries are luxuries.