The first time I ever successfully sneaked backstage at a concert was Counting Crows at the Greek Theater in 1999. I was standing by a gate, and someone came out with a VIP sticker-patch and asked me if I wanted it. I thought I had won the goddamned lottery and was so effing PUMPED...until...I came upon Adam Duritz w…

The moment I got to the twist in the middle, the book went flying across the room. I was so mad that I had fallen for it. I only skimmed the rest of the book because while I wanted to know what happened, I felt the need to somehow protest.

She is a diseased or abnormal plant that should be removed.

Stop trying to make "rogue" happen!

Man she just beats that "rogue" thing to death. Your moment is over.

CHHHHHHHHHHHHH CHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH BWAAAAAM daaaaaaaam BWAM dam.

I remember when this was vamping.

I'd be upset if I went to a Kanye West show and he DIDN'T go on an offensive rant while wearing a bejeweled mask. I think this is more or less what we've all come to expect.

Michelle and Zac match made in abbtastic heaven.

When I was three years old, I had this to say about fireworks: "Pretty lights go bang bang bang." More than half a century later, I stand by that assessment. Also, happy birthday, Malia! I'm really sorry I can never remember how to pronounce your name.

Liner on bottom lids isn't always wrong, but she is doing it the wrong way.

I'm a big fan of this game as well. Still don't fully understand the rules, but here in Canada TSN has been playing a fair bit of it on Saturday mornings. Highly entertaining. Even the referees are entertaining (the crazy reverse throw in by the ref, the intense finger pointing for goals and behinds)

Not particularly obscure, and I wouldn't consider myself a fan, but I'll never not watch Australian rules football when it's on ESPN2 at 1 a.m. That sport could be huge in this country.

Not unless you discover a prostate gland any time soon.

If you're a musician and your manager comes to you and suggests you follow the "Michael Jackson career path" you should fire that person immediately.

Oh, please. Of course this was a reimbursable business expense. Ditto Lindy's Veela groceries. And a good investment, on Jezebel's part. I was entertained for 40 seconds away from my job by both posts.

Fire moves so quick in bushfire season you won't know about it until it's on top of you.

Whoever moved in has called the police and forwarded to your address. Please remain in your home until they arrive.

Alright Black People basic bitch is officially dead. Meet me over at #blacktwitter in 2o min to discuss new alternatives, b/c thot is also on it's way out.

There were already fires in the area, and the organizers chose to ignore it.