Actual conversation regarding that Maroon 5 song:

If one more fucking PA calls me "Mr. Boreanaz" I will cut a bitch...

Isn't most of your family dead?

(sigh) Remember when Robert Deniro's name was an indicator of, if not necessarily a masterpiece, at least something worth the price of admission & popcorn? Maybe even Raisinettes?

So you're saying there are no gods in Fulton?

(mouthgasm)

Poor, poor Katie Holmes. She'll never get that Oscar unless she starts double-fisting Lucky Strikes.

.....yes.

3) If a gentleman is so crude as to initiate a handshake with a lady, she should take his proffered hand and shake it, whilst silently judging his behavior.

A limp hand presented palm down is meant to be kissed, not shaken. I just shake them anyway, because I like being contrary and I don't live in Antebellum Georgia.

(INTERWEB FIST BUMP)

Oh and thanks for the compliment. I have my moments.

Ooh, another brainstorm! At random performances, one of the blood-Baldwins will get replaced by Adam Baldwin-the best Baldwin, IMHO-who will do all his lines in character as Jayne from Firefly.

This has possibilities. Have David Mamet freshen the dialogue a bit, and have each Baldwin draw his role from a hat just before the curtain rises, so the audience won't know at first who's the gangster and who are the orphans. The extraneous Baldwin could wander around the stage ad-libbing or acting as sort of a greek…

But her mom had her diagnosed as ADHD! She needed those pills!

Wow, the resemblance is pretty striking. He should make Daniel his understudy.

Or the Golden Globes.

When did Alec Baldwin turn into Daniel Baldwin???

She was on enough downers to drop a feral Keith Richards, and she was STILL borderline hysterical most of the time on that show.

Hopefully everyone has seen THIS by now...