Like, why the fuck would she leave her couch there?

So the reason real estate exists outside of NYC is that some people don't want to live there? I thought it was because the planet is actually much larger than the island of Manhattan.

From observing bachelorette parties in the wild, it seems like it's a requirement that one member of the party try to hook up, another member cockblocks that person, and the rest get caught up in the ensuing drama— thereby "ruining" the party. So short answer to your question: tradition.

In what sense are Asians (or Asian sitcom characters) an "acceptable, unthreatening gateway to black culture"?

Yeah, screw them for not walking out and immediately finding one of all those great jobs out there!

Is there free pizza? If you want college kids to join up with you you HAVE to offer free pizza

Just a personal preference, I think you should drop the one from Jacob Salazar. That is a textbook example of a functionally illiterate person getting help ordering their food, not a dumb person being a jerk/insane.

I'm all for making fun of jerks, but sometimes a bit of sympathy for someone with a shameful problem…

The restaurant seems to have provided her with a menu, and if she actually had the "bread" the last time around, she would have had the opportunity to discover that it wasn't bread.

'What's better for my baby; Gin or a Long Island?'

Why is spring?

I think that was every restaurant everywhere.

There is a major rash of cringe-inducing (if you know anything about animal behavior) "cute" pictures being spread around the interwebs featuring dogs and children (often babies). In the photos the dogs are often displaying signs of fear, stress or aggravation. Even when they're not it's not wise to encourage pushing…

Damn, and the dog is even black. :(

And again, there is no crime here.

In SF as they were declaring us protestors a "public safety hazard" and threatening us with force some bro was basically dragging his lifeless santacon attending friend past us. That dude needed a hospital for sure, the protestors called the cops attention to them, and the cops basically shrugged and continued forcing…

And the worse part is that all of those vandal assholes have already left the country!

Gotta say, some of these Columbia folks are steadily chipping away at my bad opinion of Ivy Leaguers.

I didn't say i thought it was a smart plan....

"Daddy wants to get his rocks off!"

If only everyone who can't say "jalapeño, could be as entertaining as Ricky.