The widespread refusal to wear protective caps is the reason most of these players are padres in the first place.

It's safe to assume this is the first time this guy's crotch rocket has gotten wet.

It seems my pastor was right. "Partying solo" does constitute abuse.

The world hasn't seen a red negotiate a wall this well since Mikhail Gorbachev.

I'd say these pastel-like colors are better suited for WASPs.

As an Astros fan, I watched both Kerry Wood's 20k game and Matt Cain's perfect game in their entirety. I've never seen a game more dominant than Wood's. He was amazing that day against a good Astros team. The Cain game was impressive, but that particular Astros team (in accordance with recent history) was an…

This particular bit may have fallen flat, but public speaking can be crippling and some people need a crutch to help them rise to the occasion.

Jayson Werth will go into the record books as the first MLBer to come up short on Jose Altuve.

This video is an impressive get. Just last week we saw in the Heat game how far an athlete would go to make sure there was no documentation of a colon running.

That the VIP's have a steady and safe climb to the top, while the commoners are forced to navigate a perilous path, while maddening, is an obvious metaphor for how difficult it is for soccer novices to understand the meaning of the offside penalty.

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It's no surprise the Buffalo Bills fan failed to make it over the hump on 4 consecutive attempts.

tl;dr He sat on it.

This looks remarkably similiar to footage of George W Bush's amateur baseball career.

Jesus. It's a wonder these guys ever got into the cup.

"I blacked out. I don't really remember."

When a woman is dressed like this on ice, it's a given that you're going to see a conspicuous muff.

This comment in retrospect.

Luckily, there is no risk of punching himself out.

It's not so easy to keep the Mexicans on the other side of that line, now is it?