Yeah, but he’ll still get high with you afterwards.

It’s because he has fun by doing stuff that he thinks will be funny and dumb and make people laugh rather than having fun by being a dick to people.

For most of these people all you need to do is tell them that someone called Ajit Pai is going to change the internet and they will be up in arms over what a non American is doing. 

I particularly enjoyed the modified t-shirt cannons firing maple syrup into the crowd.

The toughest part of being a Jahlilbird is the boredom.

Have they tried playing without oven mitts on?

To be more accurate, Chitlins is the black version of kissing dogs on the anus.

These guides were/are/always will be great.

It’s cute seeing people from such different backgrounds together, she has had a sheltered life away from sports and jocks while he has had a sheltered life away from intelligence.

If they can replace Daario Naharis and Will’s mum on Fresh Prince of Bel Air then they can replace Kevin Spacey’s smug face without bothering to have a redemption arc in his storyline.

The R in HR stands for resources. Never forget that. You are a supply to be tapped - HR’s job is to ensure the resource is not more trouble than it is worth, not to represent the resource.

My best ever Scrabble move was setting up my opponent to hit me with bicuspid.

TL;DR

Disaster completely understates Peterman’s performance. What he put up was the Titanic crashing into the Hindenburg in Pearl Harbor.

How many different players caught passes?

My biggest complaint is that when listening to music in the car it will take a good 10 seconds to skip to the next track. This means passengers with sensitive ears may hear a bit more of some songs than I would like them to.

it’s no wonder cheerleaders and other prudes part their thighs for men of the brutish genus

You can’t get better than homemade Kopi luwak.

Low-hanging fruit is the sweetest fruit.

Obviously an Australian spy, the rotors are spinning in the other direction.