Gotta have huge Cuevas to attempt a shot like that.

This all obviously lies, there is no way a fancy dog could sleep in a room uncontaminated by pet dander.

To be fair, he only resorts to that if he can’t get in some partner-pliability first.

How about instead of getting a penalty for complaining about a penalty you take away the next penalty they would otherwise have been given. Kind of like a penalty power play. Free holds on the next down because the Receiver had a tantrum.

Poor Browns, even their QB trades fall incomplete.

The Pistons don’t start with Great Expectations but they finish with a Toliver Twist.

What is Keyser Söze?

He hit me, please trade me away.

I would rather be on an unlucky Malaysian Airlines flight.

I liked to play Theme Hospital with the goal of having vomit in every single square of the hospital.

Sometimes I think schools really should just have how to be nice classes or how to think about other people’s feelings classes because even people who are mostly good suck at both of these things a lot.

Huh, turns out that Trump is actually maintaining the dignity of his office.

Does it come with a free pack of “You’re a disappointment and you’ll never amount to anything stickers”?

He should have a fine career unless herpes ruin it.

If this doesn’t lead to right wing militias taking over park headquarters I don’t know what will.

Obviously the Sixers didn’t pay extra for no-Fultz insurance.

Drew, I don’t want to upset you but Kimchi with mayonnaise and rice is a delight.

Martavis has a bike with only one wheel for 3 yards but it is still a much better bike.

Not even Joe Buck Live can compete with this.

Filed to: ParoleMets.