Omg i loved Battlechess! My favorite part is kicking the doors.

I don't live in Arizona anymore, but when I did, if I ever told anyone I was not from the area they'd tell me this. Paraphrasing, of course:

I've had such a crush on Ashley Feinberg and now that she finally talking about cocks.....I feel like an idiot. Also dirty.

York! The city f****** Facebook Year in Review is total bull crappy. The picture that is supposed to be me at the beginning? It's somebody else. Nobody is tagged in the photo so how does facebook automatically assume that that giggity guy is me? That's bull puppy in fact.

No. Cybernetrix by Carlton Mellick III is Neuromancer but better

I know it's hard to be a hero, but you just have to try. Do you know what happens if you don't try to be a f****** hero? You become a f****** loser. Or at best you become a guy that's not a hero, even though he's just like a step above being a loser. I know it's hard, & I know so he can do it, but I know that they…

to write, meet! To have two dicks. If you know who couldn't handle two dicks? North Kofuckingrea. Let's make 'um choke on it. Dick. With a handle. And a hammer and the nail, in a torrent. a BitTorrent, that is. Sony, this is your chance to shine. I'm serious. No one can do this except Sony, and Sony knows it. And…

BitTorrent! BitTorrent, BitTorrent, BitTorrent. In conclusion, f****** BitTorrent. Seriously, it's the only option that makes more sense. It is the only rode that maintains the high ground. If this movie doesn't come out, then that's it. Mankind is done. North Korea is what's next. But you can fix this, Sony, if you…

Sony needs to do the right thing and release the film via bit torrent. bit torrent is the only option that makes sense.

I certainly don't mean to side with the pirates (or the content industry for that matter), but does it matter that the content industry is crumbling? The movie industry as we know it has existed for about 90 years, and the music industry for slightly less than that. These industries thrived when consumption was…

I just use my connections in the movie industry.

The mustache contest

The opening lines of Doctah Pussay's novles are all gold:

this literally put me on the streets. I am destitute. Thank goodness for the repube victory. :(

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck those fucking fuckers i !ust of gave tyem $4 since i first used swype on my nokia with symbian. That was 2009ish. Why are they bleeding me dry? Fuck welp I guess time to stop using emoji. Fuck

Randy Keegan's "Pricktures" archive. That guy jam cammed his junk 10 times a day, at least. This was way before the term dick pics was coined, though obviously if you'd described it that way we'd know what you meant.

Nnnno. Remember Tablet Mode? They used to shove the buttons off to the side. I miss Tablet Mode. Fahk. Thanks for reminding me, C*ckn*z*.

Don't be obtuse. Even legitimate scietific research only ever "raises awareness".

I only type about 80 wpm, which is fairly average. my writing speed is because of a shorthand I've developed over the years; I learned one in college, and have adapted it since to be much faster.

Ooh, no. I'm a courtroom stenographer. Recording devices are not allowed, and hiring requirements for this type of job are usually at least 200 wpm handwritten. Dropping the E won't get you there, but its a start.